The lovely things my friends write in emails:

These are 2 snippets from emails I have received this week. I will take them out of context, but trust me, they were either just as offensive or just as funny in context as they are out.

From Erik:

You're not dumb, and there's no need to hate yourself. You have plenty of friends who will gladly hate you instead.

From Victor:

Unfortunately, I took the resolution after last weekend to never drink ever again. It's my weekly Monday morning resolution. On Tuesdays, I usually quit smoking.

My friends are funny. I am so proud.