Monday, September 19, 2011

Maternity Clothes = Increased Revenue

I am finally, FINALLY starting to be able to fit into my regular clothes.  I know they say that breastfeeding just melts the pounds away.  Well, THEY can go suck a pickle, because I can guarandamtee you that it did not melt the pounds away.  Mostly, breastfeeding made me want to eat the couch.  And possibly the coffee table.  I would wake up several times a night STARVING.  Like, could eat a whole large pizza, STARVING, not "oh, maybe if I just drink a glass of water my belly will stop growling".  No, this was RAVENOUS, you must feed me now, I think I may die, or my growling belly will wake the baby kind of hungry.  No wonder I couldn't lose weight.  I was eating for about 2 million.

Nonetheless, the point of the story is that YAYYY regular clothes!  HOWEVER, elastic waistbands rock and I miss them already.  No only are you ALWAYS ready to eat a big meal, but you save so much time in the bathroom.  I mean, with regular pants and all their buttons and zippers, you better have a few seconds to spare when you get to the toilet...but with maternity pants, you can cut it real close because all you have to do is pull those suckers down.  They are just efficient. 

I may do a six sigma project on it.  Maybe I can get my company to invest in maternity pants for all it's employees.

Maternity pants = Increased Productivity.

2 comments:

Pamela Elliott said...

I appreciate this post on so many levels! Especially the part about the efficiency of maternity pants. I keep thinking that by the time I can finally zip up my old pants again I'll forget to zip them up completely because I haven't had to use a zipper in about ten months now. God bless the inventor of the belly band!

Pamela Elliott said...

I appreciate this post on so many levels! Especially the part about the efficiency of maternity pants. I keep thinking that by the time I can actually zip up my old pants, i will for sure forget to zip them since it's been about 10 months since I've had to zip up pants at all!