The Ghet-tooooo...

One of my favorite things about living in the ghetto is that regardless of day or type of weather, you can always find an ice cream truck driving down the street. The ice cream truck comes EVERY SINGLE DAY. Every day. Seriously. The first time I heard the truck, I got so excited that I locked myself out of my house. Now, when I hear the 'do your ears hang low...' song, I generally wish I could slam my head in the sliding door of the ice cream truck.

Sometimes though, it gets evern ghetto-er and the truck doesn't come, but don't you worry, the people in the ghetto still need their ice cream...they hire an ice cream bike. Same concept, just with a bike...it has a little cooler trailer behind it. Not as much music, but I am pretty sure he has a horn.

I mean, I like ice cream as much as the next guy, but how many popsicles in the shape of Mickey's head can you really eat in a week? If you asked the people on my street, they would say at least 7.

Viva la ice cream truck.

The Classics.

This may be the funniest, most creepy, slightly disturbing thing I have seen in awhile. Enjoy - http://www.bikerfox.com/foxphotos2/ The BikerFox won't let you down. You wish that he would, but he never does.

The Highlight.

This weekend was Wehner Weekend IV - where my first fish camp gathers each year in October to reminisce about the days of old. Very similar to Muster, just without the candles and the addition of a few beers.

We drank, we bowled, we drank, we danced, we played 42, we drank.

On Friday night, Tommy became enraged with a deer head that he knocked from the wall. The deer fell off the wall, his antler tore a hole in TB's shirt, cut his back and fell to the floor to amputate one of his antlers. The deer is only half as deerly as he was before. Tommy's response to the situation was, "That deer is an asshole". He didn't quite seem to grasp the fact that inanimate objects can't be assholes.


Of course, he doesn't remember any of this.

Training.

I spent my day in training (well, my whole week actually) and today we practiced using a tool called JMP (pronounced JUMP). It's good fun. It's a statistical tool that allows people are unfunny to remain unfunny. Statisticians, while rich, are never funny. Ever. Especially today.

JMP is a tool that will let you evaluate lots and lots of data at once - very similar to excel, but much harder to use. Well, similar to Excel, when you input data it spits out a graph...sometimes. The difference is, when JMP spits out a graph, the instructor calls it 'eye candy'.

Yes, eye candy. Like a hot chick (or dude). My statistician teacher man was referring to graphs and charts as eye candy. That's just wrong.

We took a tally. He said eye candy in reference to a graph 7 times in an hour long module. There is nothing right about that.

And you wonder why I drink.

Kate Goes to the Movies and other mildly funny stories...

"I went to the movies on Friday night with Keith—we saw The Departed—it was GREAT! To top it all off, there was a man in the theater who may have had some mild form of Turret’s Syndrome. Whenever he sneezed (the count got up to 4), and mind you, it was the loudest sneeze that you’ve ever heard, he’ yell, at the top of his lungs, ‘f-you’. It was hysterical!!!!"

Awesome.

Yesterday at the park, me and TB were playing with the Don. We saw an older couple cuddling on the other side of the park. It was cute. Then the man mounted the woman. That's not cute. It's just inappropriate. And then he started taking off her shirt. Of course the shirt never came all the way off and of course it wasn't a man. It was 2 chicks. Humping at the dog park. And no, they weren't hot. I mean, we thought one of them was a man for awhile. Don wasn't scared of either of them, so we knew they couldn't be men. Ha.

Sweet.

I am watching The Bachelor right now and there is a chick on here with exceptionally pouty lips. There is no way in hell those lips are natural. It makes me uncomfortable just looking at her. Apparently her name is Gina and she accepts the rose. Stupid fat lips.

Blah.

I just don't have time for the blogging. I am sorry. Lots of funny things happened today on the way to the forum though. I'll try and remember them.