Top 13 Greatest Nights EVER (I assume the list will be ever changing, so check back for updates):

Note: It has been brought to my attention that there is no way that these nights could be the best nights EVER, seeing as how they don't center around 'the best thing ever' (make your assumptions). My response to that comment is that the list that revolves around 'the best thing ever' is an entirely different list and will not be posted on my blog because my mom reads it, and that's just wierd. That's not to say that 'the best thing ever' didn't happen on any of these nights, it's just saying that the night would have been great regardless of whether or not I scored (hard to believe, I know). Go team.

10. Thanksgiving break, freshman year in college: The time when I felt the need to jump into bed with my parents. This event was preceeded by a trip to Have a Nice Day Cafe where Ian's brother served me many many fishbowls of booze.

9. Sometime my junior year in high school: The night when me, Ben, Ian and that annoying girl Cassie drank tequila shots in the road in front of Ian's house. Went home and mom wanted me to help her paint. Ouch.

8. January 2006: Mullet Night at the Aeros, followed by Mullet Day at St. Arnolds and The Wet Spot. 3,000 people in Joe Dirt wigs - can life get better? I submit that it cannot. More pictures of the moo-lay can be found on my picture gallery...

7. Decemeber 22, 2005: BRI Christmas Party 2005. Thanks for the booze, Lino. You really helped a sista out that night!!

6. Feb 2005: Kate's birthday party at the Gallant Knight. Drinking, dancing and fabulous music. Kate sang "Kiss" for us, even though she didn't know the words. Ian's tab came up to $0...even though we all somehow got sufficiently wasted.

5.5 At some point my first senior year in college: Maggies Date Party with Gilmore. We had the bowling alley rented out and the theme was western. Screw that western theme, I wore a taffeta full length skirt with a Christmas tree on it. Gil and I bought a deck of cards at the gas station and played War instead of bowling...which proved to be much more conducive to our drinking of the beers. Somebody dropped us off at our homes. I think Gil ended the evening hiding under the hammock giggling waiting for his girlfriend to find him.

5. March 2004: My 23rd birthday...1 of 2 good birthday celebrations. We were the only people in the Hole in the Wall, so they let us play Green Day's "Dookie" over and over again. We pretended the table was a drum. Erik kicked a man out of the bathroom.

4.5. March 2004: My 21st birthday...the other good birthday celebration. We were in Austin for a dance convention, and by dance convention, I mean, we had to dance for 8 hours the day after my 21st birthday...starting at 8am. So, we went out. My best pals, Ben and Bez, took me out on the town. Great times were had by all...especially when Sara and I woke up in the morning, put on our leotards and realized we had email addresses written on our stomachs. Ballet that morning did not go as well as planned.

4. Sometime my 1st senior year of college: Northgathalon. 16 hours of Northgate. We had a drink at every establishment on Northgate and its surrounding bars. Then I punched a guy in the face.

3. August 2003: Drink Houston for the Houston Hottest Mom Contest. Got into a fight with the father of one of the women about who the hottest girl was. Gross.

2. August 2004: Drink Houston for Aggie Happy Hour. I danced the night away with a man who resembled a commodore and wore a lime green silk leisure suit.

1. March 2005: The Gingerman Weekend. Friday night was movies with the girls - I think we watched The Notebook? Saturday, Kate and I took our pets to The Gingerman where we met Ron Burgundy and Bull Rider. Saturday night, Kate made us dinner, (she was drunk), and then we watched Ladder 49. I cried. Seth and Mary were scared. Sunday we went to Astro World, saw butt acne and realized that if those girls can find love, so can we!! Sunday night, we watched some sports game with Lino and our sunburns.

0. February 18, 2006: St. Arnolds Brewery followed by 10 hours at the Sundown Saloon. Went to the brewery for one last hoorah before they start charging $5 for admission. Everyone had 4+ pints of beer - they just had the bowl of tokens lying around, so we decided to keep those tokens company in our pockets. Post St. Arnolds, the coaches decide we should go to the Sundown Saloon. We walk in. The curtains are paper clipped closed. There are Playboy magazines on the tables. There are about 20 people in the bar - all over the age of 70 - some are playing Texas Hold 'Em, some are just drinking beer out of cans at the bar. The Sundown Saloon doesn't have bottled beer. They don't have draft beer. They only have cheap beer and they only serve it out of cans. They provide you with a coozie though. That is important. By the end of the evening, we had Nancy and Judy (70+ year old women) playing King's Cup. They are screaming 'f**k me' and rubbing their breasts. Nancy grabbed her crotch. I almost peed my pants. Judy poured the beer from her can into a glass with ice. We signed the Playboys. We danced. We played every single song in the jukebox. It was incredible.

Both from our dear sweet Erik. Thanks buddy.

There is nothing like taking something a little too far. Gotta respect this guy. Gotta respect Bode Miller.

http://www.noobsports.com/2006/01/bode-miller-experiment-part-i.html
http://www.noobsports.com/2006/02/bode-miller-experiment-part-ii.html

Why this guy is still living with this girl, we may never know, but if he moves out, we might miss the funniness. So, let's hope they always stay together.

http://www.thingsmygirlfriendandihavearguedabout.com/

Creating Strategic Partnerships.

I was required by a work mandate to attend assertiveness training. Of all the people in the world who don't need assertiveness training, I am queen of their tribe. But whatever. They want to waste money to make me sit still for 2 days, whatever. I'd have preferred a cash donation instead, but they didn't ask me.

So I go to training. The leader of the class is a man named Yahya (pronounced Ya-ya). He is Iranian. He has a thick accent. And his name is Yahya. Thus my day begins...

Yahya is a nice guy - very amiable and I would probably enjoy him a lot if I understood a single word that came out of his mouth. But seeing as how I am deaf and already have trouble with accents, I heard nothing. The 3 inch long stand alone mustache he had going on just aggravated an exisiting problem...I couldn't even read his lips. The 'stache was so long you couldn't even tell if he was smiling or not. But his eyes smiled. I think. Or he was just leering.

In addition to his stand-alone 'stache, Yahya showed up to training in quite an ensemble. He must have purchased his shirt on his way to the seminar, because it still have the creases from how the shirt was folded in the store. One crease right across the stomach and 2 down each side of his chest. It also still had the cardboard in the collar, but I won't mention that. The side of his shirt won't stay tucked in because he has his pants sagged down so low you woulda thought he was a gangsta. I think the pants were super-saggy that day because he kept sticking his hands down the back of his pants. I guess he wanted to make sure his arse was still there. His fly was unzipped the entire morning and my view from the front row was compromising. When he returned from lunch, he must have fixed the problem because I didn't get anymore peeks at little Yahya. But he made sure the cardboard collar was still in place.

The seminar was long and boring. But the Star Trek jokes he kept making kept me alert. Oh wait, I don't watch Star Trek. I am a girl and I respect myself just a little bit. Not much. But a little.

These are the type of dorks I spend most of my days with...

Email from a co-worker:

"Thank you guys for staying open minded and taking some additional time to gather all the information so that we can make the best decision for the project and the company, this will save us a bunch of money (unfortunately it will not be on my car insurance!)

Best regards,
Marc."

Email from Erik yesterday morning:

"I don't know what finally made it click for me: was it when I walked by the mirror after breakfast and realized that I'd put gel in my hair but didn't comb it, or was it when I nearly left the apartment with my fly open? It could have been when I was tying my shoes and realized I'd rolled one sleeve up and then didn't bother with the other. I do know this: I took a roll call this morning, and one of my mind's comrades answered "here".

The only thing that got me out of bed my last dream: my car was stolen, and then my cell phone. I finally escaped being attacked by a gypsy with a slingshot, and made it into a mall where her and the midget couldn't get to me. At that point I was stranded and cut-off, and I didn't know anyone's phone numbers. I was so pissed about not being able to call any of you people to complain that I just woke up.

I guess the Aggie HH last night was just too much for this old man."

Wackos. All of yous.

Vince sent this hysterical link - might be the funniest thing I have read in a loooong time. I laughed so hard, I cried. http://www.shtick.org/Misc/ryans.htm Potty humor kills me.

And from the desk of Lino - also funny, but not as funny as link number 1: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8400730120188776481&q=gold+digger+parody

My crappy neighborHOOD!

Last night, I was minding my own business at the tail end of my jog, running on the proper side of the road, I might add, when I hear the screaching of tires and a huge crash. I don't think much of it, because frankly, I live in the ghetto and there is lots of tire screeching all the time, and there is so much construction that big crashes aren't un heard of either. I mean, just the other day, the 37 Mexicans that live next door had a family argument and bashed all of the windows out of one of their 23 beat up Toyotas. That's totally normal. On my other side is a plaster warehouse and sometimes the 37 Mexicans from next door will go to work there and make plaster. That's not relevant to the story. Sorry.

Anyways, so I do finally look behind me and I see a beat up Toyota that got t-boned by a BMW. From what I can tell, the Toyota ran the stop sign, on its way to run me over - I was only a few feet from the intersection, and Miss BMW was minding her own business and hit the piece of crap at about 35 mph. Ish.

14 Mexicans pile out of the Toyota and 1 white chick in a velour jumpsuit eases herself out of her Beamer. I go back and ask if they need help, or need me to call anyone. None of the 14 Mexicans speak any English (yea right) and the white lady, her name is Sherry, I find out later, doesn't have a cell phone. She drives a Beamer, but doesn't have a cell phone? Oh, but one of the 14 does. He has a Razr. He put 14 people in his crappy Toyota, AND he found the cash to get a Razr phone? That's just good multitasking. But I tell Sherry that if she needs anything I live in that house over there...[I point].

I go home, call mom, get some bad news - whole long other depressing blog which we won't write about here. In the middle of the call, I hear knock knock knock. Sherry is at my door. Turns out, Miss Velour Jumpsuit does have a cell phone (phew, I thought the sky was falling), and she also has a drivers license and insurance card, but of course all of those things are in her other velour jumpsuit at the office. Who keeps their insurance card in their jumpsuit?

We discuss her options and determine that the best course of action is just to call the cops and she will get a ticket for no DL and insurance, but all that can get taken care of since she does have a DL and insurance. So, the cops come. I am the only witness (even though I didn't actually see anything), so I have to chat with the cops for forever. At this point, all the 146 Mexicans that live on my street have no congregated in the street - this is the most excitement we have seen since I have lived there. The window bashing was more of a private affair - I only heard it because I live next door. Well, and then there was the time when my car got pushed into the ditch. But all of these events paled in ocmparison to the wreck last night.

Anyways, the cars get towed. I go watch gee tv and go to bed at 8:30. It was a rough day. THEN I overslept this morning. How is that possible? I went to bed at 8:30pm. That means at 4:30 (when the alarm was supposed to go off), I had already had 8 hours of sleep. How much do I really need? Let's be serious here.

On another note, the guy in work group that we don't like is dragging up today! Yeah! No more cursing at his wife or listening to him work his side job. Hopefully whoever moves into his cube doesn't smell.

MARATHON!!!

The marathon is finally over. I can have my Friday nights back. Single girls need their Friday nights.

The race was AWESOME. I had a great time (until mile 20 when I just wanted to kill myself). I haven't decided if I will run another one - but it was worth all the blood, sweat and tears. My running buddy, Lanette, and I had a goal time of 4:40 - which averages about a 10:45 minute mile. But we decided we would be totally happy with anything under 5 hours. We started off slowly and had every intention of speeding up - don't know why we thought we could pull off the negative split this time - we've never been able to do it before. But, I digress...we started off around 11 min pace, then we tried to get ahead of schedule around mile 3.

The race started badly - Lanette left her fuel belt in the car and I lost 3 of my gu's (my carbo gels) within 300 yards of the start line. I thought the girl behind me had kicked me, so I gave her death stare (I have a GREAT death stare), but then I felt bad becuase it turns out, it was just my gels falling out my shorts and onto my leg. That stupid bitch. I was able to go back and get one, but I couldnt find the other 2. I figured I could get my "Support Team" to stop by the store and get more for me. Unfortunately, it was a Sunday, and nothing is open on Sundays. Ugh.

We ran into her husband at mile 5 - he gave us her fuel belt that had HER gels in it, but of course, not mine. We run into my parents, and friends at mile 6ish right on schedule - thank you sooo much everyone for being there (Lindsey, Erik, Gilmore, Natalie, Micah and Vince). You made it so much easier and enjoyable! Lanette and I kept on truckin'. Picked up the pace a little - needed to get a little ahead of schedule.

I have to pee - I ALWAYS have to pee at a race. No one knows why. But all the port-a-potties have lines and I am not about to waste valuable time peeing when I could be running. So I held it until the half marathoners turned around at mile 9. Actually, I held it till mile 13, when I took my first crap in a port-a-potty. Ever hovered while poo-ing? It's rough. But I did it! Anyways, back to mile 9...we pass a catholic church, where I, a Methodist, took communion and was splashed with holy water. Hysterical. Those cathlics love their booze and so do I. Elvis passes us and we get pissed, so we speed up. Pace is going well. Then "The Stomper" is behind us - you know the stomper, the guy who always steps just a little too hard? That CAN'T be good for his knees. He passes us too. Man, we are slow. We got some quality drugs from a strange lady on the side of the road (our knees hurt) and off we went...

Mile 13, I take my first hovering crap - fantastic. Meet the friends and fam again - they are great support. At mile 15 there is a HUGE hill. When I say huge, I mean bigger than Mount Killamangaro (sp?). Freaking huge. Up and down. Left right left right left right. Round the corner, and to the Galleria we go. Take some drugs, but from a reputable source this time - thanks Gaye! Kate and Janelle are waiting for us at mile 17 - they join in the race. They are looking so fresh and nice - really made me and Lanette look like crap. Haha. We just let them chatter around us - cause we have talked ourselves out. Pass the support team at mile 18 - stock up on oranges - I am pretty sure there is some quality video footage of me at this point. Scary. Kate and Janelle leave us at mile 19 at the Dow water station - got some support there - thanks Rumaldo, Allan, and Lisa!

We were having a great time until shortly after we go under the 610 underpass...Lanette needs to walk - I am exhausted, so I agree. We walk, and then she says she needs to stretch - so we stop and stretch. Then she says she can't finish. WHAT?? So, off I go - alone. I hit "the wall" shortly after that. My body completely shut down - my legs hurt, my body hurts, my brain hurts, etc. And my running buddy was gone. I make it to mile 21 - where the budwieser truck is - and I chug a beer. Somehow, that made everthing okay. Hi, my name is Christy and I think I might be an alcoholic.

I see my crew shortly after that, and I lose it. I am just about drained of everything I have, and I teared up a bit. I guess they felt sorry for me, cause Erik caught up with me not too long after that. Luckily, he was wearing running shoes with his cargo shorts. He didn't really fit in, but I appreciated every bit of anyway. We round the corner off Shepherd and Allen, and this lady says the water stop is right up ahead. What the fuck was she talking about? It was way the fuck up there. Fuck fuck fuck. At this point, I am tired and don't have many non-curse words in my brain. We get to mile 23 and Ed is there - he joins the Christy Bandwagon. We walked for a bit to work out a calf cramp, but when we saw the photographers we had to run again - don't wanna be walking in my pics! But then we walked again right after. Haha. But, with Erik and Ed, I was able to finish that race in 4:53:25. If they hadn't been there, I might have totally missed my 5 hour time limit.

We rounded the last corner, and they peeled off to let me finish. I could see the finish line, so I kicked it up a notch...what I didn't realize was that the finish line was fucking far away. Far away. So I had to bring it back down. But once it was within reach, I picked it up and brought it home.

Running this marathon is definately the most rewarding thing I have ever done - mostly because it was the first thing I did all by myself, for myself, totally on my own. It was amazing. I couldn't have done it without the support of my friends and family - thanks guys. You were there with me for such an awesome day!! I am so happy I could share with you!

Crossing that finish line was an incredible feeling. And floating my first keg was even better. And then almost floating the keg that Frank brought over was good too. So, uh, there is some DosXX in my backyard if you want some. I think I still have stuff for s'mores too. Come on over!!

Thanks guys - you helped make this experience so awesome. And now it is over. Thank God.

Stats:
Chip time 4:53:25
Overall place: 3828/5500
Female place: 1200/3000
Age group (20-24 - young effers): 208/283

MARATHON COUNT DOWN!!

3 days till the marathon. I can't wait. I don't normally write about anything serious, but I had to mention this. Sorry. I got this quote today in my marathon newletter - I am tool - yes, I know. Anyways,

"The marathon is a charismatic event. It has everything. It has drama. It has competition. it has comaraderie. It has heroism. Every jogger can't dream of being an Olympic champion, but he can dream of finishing a marathon." - Fred Lebow

And you guys KNOW how I cry when large groups of people come together for a common goal. I am pretty sure I will be the poofy red eyed runner on the race track. Great. As long as there aren't any children singing, I might be able to calm down a little. The Star Spangled Banner at the beginning is sure to do me in though.

But seriously, I am ready to get my social life back - I haven't been out on a Friday night in 27 weeks. Next Friday is not only pay day but my first free Friday in 6 months. Who's with me? This has been an awesome training experience - hopefully the race goes as well!! My foot hasn't bothered me in a week - just keep me in your thoughts while I run in the sweltering heat on Sunday morning. Awesome!

I can't wait!!

Yo IPC! Yea, you know me!

My pal, Benny and I were talking the other night...discussing a number of things, but one item in particular stood out for me.

Ben lives in Seattle and I see him once a year at Christmas, and therefore our friendship is based solely on phone conversation. His girlfriend is often around when we are talking on the phone. He typically calls me 'man' or 'dude' or some other slang generally used to reference the male specie. This apparently bothers said girlfriend. Why? I have no idea.

But Ben's response to this was that I wasn't just a girl. I was a member of the IPC. Imaginary Penis Club. I can only assume that this means that I have an imaginary wiener. I hope that I use my fake wienie for good and not evil.

I seriously don't know why I am single.

My Eating Habits.

LIKES:
Cheese Nachos
Cheese Pizza
Macaroni and Cheese (homemade, not boxed)
Donuts - Glazed, White Frosted, White Frosted with sprinkles
Noodles
Hard Candies of all sorts
All Cheeses (except those specifically listed under the 'dislikes' tab)
Most dead animals
Vanilla Yogurt with Gummi Bears
Pretzels - extra salty

DISLIKES:
Crumbly Cheeses, Feta Cheese, Bleu Cheese, Goat Cheese
American Cheese
Any cheese melted on any type of bread, specifically; Grilled Cheese Sandwiches, Cheeseburgers Tuna Fish (canned)
Bananas (only in quiet places)
Icecream with nuts in it
Cookies with nuts in it
Donuts with nuts on it
Brownies with nuts in it
Salad with nuts in it
Chocolate
Fast Food Hamburgers (not that I have ever had one)
Almond Joy and all other cocnut candies
Black Licorice
Beans (excluding refried)
Peas and most other green veggies

I will update this list as often as possible.

Just to give you an idea of a daily meal plan for me, today I have had:

1 dozen donut holes
2 donuts - 1 glazed, 1 frosted with sprinkles
A pretzel stick
2 peppermints
A roll of Lifesavers
2 Poptarts (1 package is 2 Poptarts)
And a slice of Banana Nut Bread (which I spit out becuase I was unaware there were nuts in it)

My dinner will most likely consists of pasta of some sort.

From the desk of Ms. Miliner...

This is what she does all day long: http://www.emotioneric.com/

And that, my dears, is why we keep her around.

According to Dr. A.R. Dykes of the British Institution of Structural Engineers 1976

THE ENGINEER'S CREED

"ENGINEERING IS THE ART OF MODELING MATERIALS WE DO NOT WHOLLY UNDERSTAND INTO SHAPES WE CANNOT PRECISELY ANALYZE SO AS TO WITHSTAND FORCES WE CANNOT PROPERLY ASSESS IN SUCH A WAY THAT THE PUBLIC HAS NO REASON TO SUSPECT THE EXTENT OF OUR IGNORANCE."

Billy D thought of me!

http://www.thephatphree.com/features.asp?StoryID=1800&SectionID=11&LayoutType=1

Thanks Bill...you're a pal!

Mildy offensive material:

A few Happy Holiday Treats from your pal Christy...

A message from our sponsor: http://load.pquinn.com/binaries/fries/

And the lyrics from the all-time WORST Christmas song...EVER. Every Christmas, at my parents church, a huge white man sings this song at the Christmas service. The song is good, the lyrics are good, the singing is good. What is HORRIBLE about this song is that it is sung by a white man...we can barely control our laughter. It is HORRENDOUS.

Sweet little Jesus Boy,

they made you be born in a manger.

Sweet little Holy Child,

didn't know who You was.

Didn't know you come to save us,

Lord;to take our sins away.

Our eyes was blind,

we couldn't see,

we didn't know who You was.

Long time ago, you was born.

Born in a manger low,

Sweet little Jesus Boy.

The world treat You mean, Lord;

treat me mean, too.

But that's how things is down here,

we didn't know t'was You.

You done showed us how,

we is trying.

Master, You done showed us how,

even when you's dying.

Just seem like we can't do right,

look how we treated You.

But please, sir, forgive us Lord,

we didn't know 'twas You.

Sweet little Jesus Boy,

born long time ago.

Sweet little Holy Child,

and we didn't know who You was.

White man, singing THAT song. HI-sterical.

EATPOOP

Email from a co-worker about people who can't just relax and have a good time:

-----Original Message----->
From: Beto (Beto) (HO)
Sent: Tuesday, November 22, 2005 9:07 AM
To: Christy (CM)
Subject: RE: turkey day

Well they don't know how to live then.

I'm thinking I will start some kind of new organization for those kind of people. I need to think of a cool name first like "Ethical Americans Together Practicing On Obstructing Pleasure" or EATPOOP for short.

Yeah that's it.

-----Original Message-----
From: Christy (CM)
Sent: Tuesday, November 22, 2005 8:57 AM
To: Beto (Beto) (HO)
Subject: RE: turkey day

Haha - I know, but there are some people who don't understand about having> a little bit of fun...

Christy
Ext. 2493

ROOPHIES!!

Yup, you heard me right. Roophies. Rohipnol - or however you spell it. I had some dental work done on Friday, and as most people who know me know, I am absolutely horrified of the dentist (along with pretty much everything else in the world). At my last appointment, the doc was telling me about the procedure - I was supposed to be getting a crown done. He was telling me about the TV that I could watch the whole procedure on...yada yada yada. My response to that was,"If I can see a TV in the room, you haven't given me enough drugs". So, he says, we'll give you something fantastic. Stronger than valium - much stronger - and it will make you sleepy. GREAT!

Well, since it is a controlled substance, you can only get it the day before and it requires about 37 signed papers from the doctor. So, on Thursday, I go get the prescription - my doc asks if I have a boyfriend. I think this is wierd. I say no. He says that is too bad becuase I could have had a lot of fun drugging him and then taking advantage if I had one. Hahahaha. ARE you kidding me?

There are specific instructions on what to take and when. There are 2 types of pills. One bottle has 3 pills in it - we will call them red pills. One bottle has 2 pills in it - we will call them blue pills. I am supposed to take on red pill before I go to bed on Thursday night to help me sleep well. Then a red and a blue pill an hour and half before my appt on Friday. That leaves an extra red pill and an extra blue pill. So, I decide that I should OBVIOUSLY take those too.

Ed picks me up, apparently, takes me to the dentist...I get some work done, apparently, and Kate picks me up to take me home. All I remember of the appointment is me trying to stick my tongue in the hole where the cavity once was, and then the dentist getting angry that I won't stop. But that's it.

I know that I fell asleep on the couch when I got home. I know that at some point I thought it would be a good idea to light candles. Oh yea, roophied girls and fire - good combo!! I moved to my bed and slept there for awhile. I remember a few bits and pieces from Friday night, but thats about it. I think I "drunk dialed" a few people....never a good idea.

When I woke up on Saturday morning, there were Taco Bell wrappers all over the kitchen that Donny the Dog had dug out of the trashcan. I didn't know where they came from. Later, Janelle called. She said she had been over the night before and brought Taco Bell. Oh good. I had a friend over and I don't remember it. GREAT! And apparently, I made dinner for myself. I bet it was magically delicious. We APPARENTLY watched TV and chatted for a couple of hours. She said I seemed kinda wierd, but okay.

All in all, I slept and/or functioned without memory for about 36 hours. Impressive. I feel quite rested.

Just an FYI - the date rape drug DOES work. Proceed with caution.

We will remember. Bonfire '99.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5916475239552283359&q=aggie+bonfirehttp://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5916475239552283359&q=aggie+bonfire

Christmas Gifts for EVERYONE!!

So the Holiday season is upon us and everybody is struggling to find that special something for their special someone.

But what to buy?

How about a cute cuddly toy?

Sounds like a plan?

http://www.thecoolhunter.net/lifestyle/pee-poo-toy.php

If I don't get Pee&Poo this year, I might shoot myself in the face.

In case you wondered where the Goonies are now...

http://kiddo78.blogspot.com/2005/05/goonies-20-year-reunion.html

I know I did.

At the Office...

On the "swap shop" bulletin board in the break room of my office thismorning:

FOR SALE: 30'X30' tent, 17'X6' trailer WITH skirt, 5000 watt generator, portacan, 30 tables and chairs, baptism tank - $4300 OBO

Just the other day I was needing a tent that is larger than myhouse, a port-a-potty and a baptism tank. I will conduct baptisms from my backyard now while taking a crap in my portacan for an audience of 30. Let me know if you are wanting to take advantage of this opportunity.