So I had this boyfriend in high school. And by boyfriend, I mean this boy who liked me and I kind of liked him, but thought it was creepy that he was a senior and I was a freshman, so I didn't really want to go out with him. I didn't know how to say no (or sure that I WANTED to say no), so I asked my mom if I could go out with him...knowing she would say no for me. She's a good woman.
If I had really wanted to go out with him, I would have just gone out with him. I was difficult that way*. So of course, mom said no because she is a rational human being and when your 14 year old daughter wants to go out with a 19 year old boy (he was old for his grade), you ALWAYS say no. Even if you know she will go anyway. At least then, when she gets impregnated, you can say "Nanananana, I told you so"...and then you can go about raising her High School Love Child.
For the sake of the story, we will say his name was Eagle. This doesn't really protect the innocent at all, because his name was another bird...which totally didn't help his cause. He was a nice enough guy and I DID like him...but only kind of. He was into cars (which I SOOO wasn't)...and into low-rider cars (which I was even LESS into than just regular cars)...especially since I didn't even have my drivers permit. He was into really loud music in his car - you know, like the BOOM BOOM BOOM music that makes you want to kill people as they zip through your neighborhood or stop next to you at an intersection (this is probably why I am deaf today). But is probably also why I was not a teen mom (he knocked up a couple of girls shortly after our "relationship" ended). See mom? I DID make good decisions.
Anyway, we used to spend the afternoons hanging out on the bed of his truck in front of my parents house. The fact that this was fun to a 19 year-old was baffling to me and only furthered his creepiness factor. I mean, I felt SO cool that I was hanging with a 19 year-old, but seriously thought it was wierd that he thought it was cool to hang with me. In my parents yard.
Alas, we had unrequited love. And therefore, he sent me love letters**. Of the handwritten/cologne doused variety. They arrived regularly in the mail...and made every other piece of paper in the mailbox stink to high heaven. He must have wasted bottles of cologne on these letters.
Fast forward to present time: We just had a re-orginization at work. I have a new boss who shows up in a meeting the other day wearing a familiar scent. I immediately placed it and the hook brought me back man. I could totally see myself sitting in my parents yard (with straight teeth because I wore my retainer all the time back then), with my friend Eagle listening to Satellite by DMB in the bed of his truck...
To sum up: My boss wears the same cologne as my high school "boyfriend". Not sure how I'm supposed to get through my yearly performance review without dying.
*Let's hope Anna inherited my hair and nothing else. The less she is like me, the more likely that Tommy and I are to survive her childhood.
**I also recieved a recorded-from-the-radio cassette tape of Careless Whisper by Wham.
Update: It has been brought to my attention that this story would be significantly better if my new boss was my old boyfriend, so for the sake of hilarity, we will say it is so. Done. New boss = Ex-Boyfriend. (But in reality, they only smell the same...)
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Workout of the Day
I walked to the mailbox today. Man, that sh1t is far away.
That said, the stairs in my house are no longer the daunting task that they were during pregnancy. I can actually walk up them without having to take a break mid-way.
My body looks a lot like it did in college. A little swollen, big boobs, and a beer gut. Although, back then, it was due to the beer. And tequila. And whiskey. And cheese fries. Oh, the cheese fries.
My goal for Friday is to walk our street. It's about a half mile long...so there and back will be a mile. It's our usual dog walking path, but I will probably do it without the pugzys because it will likely take me at least an hour. Stupid stitches. Making me an invalid. I was watching The Biggest Loser tonight (BTW - what is UP with all the bungee jumping? I don't watch this show to watch bungee jumping or to hear stupid metaphors about life that are related to bungee jumping. I watch it for the workouts and the weight loss. End rant.) and was VERY jealous of their workouts. And then I looked through all my friends pics who ran Boston (shout out to Audrey who ran Boston for the first time! Congrats!). And then through the NOLA 70.3 pics (special shout out to Allison who raced her first 70.3 in New Orleans this past weekend! Even though the swim was cancelled, she rocked it!). And then the MS150 pics... I was GREEN with envy. Green I say! Soon, little Paduwon. Soon.
In baby news, this is funny. That said, you know you are hormonal when this makes you cry so hard that you can't even it read it aloud to your husband. Dear lord. The hormones.
“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.
May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.
When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.
Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.
Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.
May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.
Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen.Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.
O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.
And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.
And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.
Amen.
-Tina Fey
That said, the stairs in my house are no longer the daunting task that they were during pregnancy. I can actually walk up them without having to take a break mid-way.
My body looks a lot like it did in college. A little swollen, big boobs, and a beer gut. Although, back then, it was due to the beer. And tequila. And whiskey. And cheese fries. Oh, the cheese fries.
My goal for Friday is to walk our street. It's about a half mile long...so there and back will be a mile. It's our usual dog walking path, but I will probably do it without the pugzys because it will likely take me at least an hour. Stupid stitches. Making me an invalid. I was watching The Biggest Loser tonight (BTW - what is UP with all the bungee jumping? I don't watch this show to watch bungee jumping or to hear stupid metaphors about life that are related to bungee jumping. I watch it for the workouts and the weight loss. End rant.) and was VERY jealous of their workouts. And then I looked through all my friends pics who ran Boston (shout out to Audrey who ran Boston for the first time! Congrats!). And then through the NOLA 70.3 pics (special shout out to Allison who raced her first 70.3 in New Orleans this past weekend! Even though the swim was cancelled, she rocked it!). And then the MS150 pics... I was GREEN with envy. Green I say! Soon, little Paduwon. Soon.
In baby news, this is funny. That said, you know you are hormonal when this makes you cry so hard that you can't even it read it aloud to your husband. Dear lord. The hormones.
“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.
May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.
When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.
Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.
Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.
May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.
Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen.Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.
O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.
And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.
And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.
Amen.
-Tina Fey
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Recluse.
I haven't been writting because I haven't really left my house much in the last few weeks. Therefore, I have nothing to write about. Sorry kiddos! I know you are tragically sad.
I've been hole-ing up in my casa because I just got tired from all the travelling and the working out and the blah! My grandma passed away and Tommy I drove to Dallas after work on a Friday, to Odessa on Monday after working from my parents house all day, and then back to Houston on Tuesday after the funeral. We both worked most of Monday and Tuesday, got back in town around 1am Tuesday night, worked Wed-Fri and then packed up to drive to New Orleans for the weekend. That's over 2000 miles of car trip, in one week, while working 40 hours, attending a funeral and a high school reunion. No wonder my face looked like a giant zit at the reunion.
Hence, I am exhausted. I don't want to get in the car to drive ANYWHERE anytime soon. We were supposed to go to Dallas this weekend for my first attempt at a 1:50 half marathon, but the thought of driving there makes me want to hurl a little, sooo, there are two bibs up for grabs if anyone wants them.
In other news, Tommy and I scored free 10th row seats on the first baseline to the Astros game. This game started off precariously when the beer man refused to serve me beer. I am 29 years old for crying out loud. Give me the dam beer. And then the baked potato line didn't have any cheese. WTF. What the hell kind of baseball game IS this?
But then things turned around.
I caught a ball!! Well, actually it landed in my chicken fingers (I WANTED a baked potato, but a potato without cheese, well, that's just sad) but I figure I can say that I caught it. But THEN the guy next to me leans over and asks if I have kids. I say no. He says he has a 6 year old and an 8 year old and can he have my ball. I hand it to him. 5 minutes later I ask for it back. Asshole didn't even bring his kids with him to the game. He can let his kids have a ball when he decides to bring them. What a jerk.
BUT THEN THINGS TURNED AROUND.
We got on the kiss cam. WHAT? This was approximately 2 seconds after I said there was no way we could be on the kiss cam. And then my friend called to tell me he saw me and I was famous.
Tommy wore his new fancy jersey (three men complemented him on it...I think I did good!) and I am now famous. Go me.
And then the next day we got to run the bases at the park.
BEST. WEEK. IN. BASEBALL. EVER.
But pretty much after that, I haven't left my house. I mean, how can you top that? You can't. And I'm not gonna try. I'm pooped and all I want to do is sleep in and go to the movies.
I've been hole-ing up in my casa because I just got tired from all the travelling and the working out and the blah! My grandma passed away and Tommy I drove to Dallas after work on a Friday, to Odessa on Monday after working from my parents house all day, and then back to Houston on Tuesday after the funeral. We both worked most of Monday and Tuesday, got back in town around 1am Tuesday night, worked Wed-Fri and then packed up to drive to New Orleans for the weekend. That's over 2000 miles of car trip, in one week, while working 40 hours, attending a funeral and a high school reunion. No wonder my face looked like a giant zit at the reunion.
Hence, I am exhausted. I don't want to get in the car to drive ANYWHERE anytime soon. We were supposed to go to Dallas this weekend for my first attempt at a 1:50 half marathon, but the thought of driving there makes me want to hurl a little, sooo, there are two bibs up for grabs if anyone wants them.
In other news, Tommy and I scored free 10th row seats on the first baseline to the Astros game. This game started off precariously when the beer man refused to serve me beer. I am 29 years old for crying out loud. Give me the dam beer. And then the baked potato line didn't have any cheese. WTF. What the hell kind of baseball game IS this?
But then things turned around.
I caught a ball!! Well, actually it landed in my chicken fingers (I WANTED a baked potato, but a potato without cheese, well, that's just sad) but I figure I can say that I caught it. But THEN the guy next to me leans over and asks if I have kids. I say no. He says he has a 6 year old and an 8 year old and can he have my ball. I hand it to him. 5 minutes later I ask for it back. Asshole didn't even bring his kids with him to the game. He can let his kids have a ball when he decides to bring them. What a jerk.
BUT THEN THINGS TURNED AROUND.
We got on the kiss cam. WHAT? This was approximately 2 seconds after I said there was no way we could be on the kiss cam. And then my friend called to tell me he saw me and I was famous.
Tommy wore his new fancy jersey (three men complemented him on it...I think I did good!) and I am now famous. Go me.
And then the next day we got to run the bases at the park.
BEST. WEEK. IN. BASEBALL. EVER.
But pretty much after that, I haven't left my house. I mean, how can you top that? You can't. And I'm not gonna try. I'm pooped and all I want to do is sleep in and go to the movies.
Friday, October 09, 2009
Leaping Lizards.
Every year in elementary school, Ms. Raiden, the evil PE teacher extraordinaire, started a jump rope team. I, big surprise, never made the team. This failure still haunts me. I loved loved loved jumping rope. Nowadays, I can barely make it 2 minutes before I am on the ground gasping my last breath, but back then, it was easy.
These girls, however, ALL made the jump rope team and pretty much rock my world. I promise you that this 8 minute video is worth every single second.
If I ever see Ms. Raiden on the street, I'm pretty sure I would take her down. I'd probably take down Ms. Pain the art teacher too. She was a big pain in the you know what (yeah, we said that joke a lot back then).
Seriously. 8 minutes of video. Worth it.
(On another note, Kona is tomorrow! Can't wait to watch some race coverage!)
These girls, however, ALL made the jump rope team and pretty much rock my world. I promise you that this 8 minute video is worth every single second.
If I ever see Ms. Raiden on the street, I'm pretty sure I would take her down. I'd probably take down Ms. Pain the art teacher too. She was a big pain in the you know what (yeah, we said that joke a lot back then).
Seriously. 8 minutes of video. Worth it.
(On another note, Kona is tomorrow! Can't wait to watch some race coverage!)
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
10 Year High School Reunion
Dude. I had my 10 year high school reunion this weekend. DUDE.
Apparently, this event made a lot of my other classmates feel old. I didn't feel old at all...am I the only one? I think it helps that most of my friends are older than me, so no matter what, I will always be the young one. Well, I'll be the young one until they all die and I have to make friends with the spring chickens at the nursing home that is.
Nonetheless, after much difficulty planning the stupid thing (Yes, I planned it It's who I am. I can't fight my destiny. But no, there ain't no way in hell I'm planning the next one.) with Kelly, the event went surprisingly well. I think all had a good time...there were complaints here and there, but hey, when you raise your kids to think they deserve the world and then you fail to deliver, they get a little angry. So, eh, sorry you didn't get your free coke...we decided a free keg of delicious beer was a better use of the money. My hangover thanks you.
So, it was fun. It was a lot of fun. It was great to see everyone and catch up with old friends. I expected there to be a mish mash of people, but unfortunately for my gossip mill, most everyone that showed up was still thin, attractive, and succesful. My mom promised me that all the mean girls in school would grow up to be fat and nasty...but I think she lied. Or else they just aren't fat and nasty yet. I'll continue to hold out hope.
But I would say that the biggest let down of the evening was Facebook. Through Facebook, I have caught up with so many old friends which is awesome. HOWEVER, through Facebook, I caught up on all the litle details of their lives: Are they married? Do they have kids? Are they fat? Where do they live? Etc... So, when it came time to make small talk with this person I haven't seen in a decade, we had nothing to talk about. We already knew all the stuff. I knew you had a kid and it was a girl and she has a wierd name...I've been stalking you in on Facebook for a solid 2 years. Duh!
But the best part of the reunion was catching up with my old friends Sara and Alicia. Those girls got me through the hard stuff in high school and most of the hard stuff in college. I miss them dearly and hold our friendship so close to my heart...I wish I lived closer so it would all be easier. But, it's not and I have no intention of moving...so hear this Bez and Al, I WILL be keeping in touch better. So prepare!!! Love you guys!!
I think the highlight of my evening was going home to parent's house afterwards and smoking the cigars we found in the attic that my dad bought when I born...they say "It's a Girl". Dude. 28 year old cigars that have been living in the attic...you know you had fun when you think, "eh, it's not too bad".
Apparently, this event made a lot of my other classmates feel old. I didn't feel old at all...am I the only one? I think it helps that most of my friends are older than me, so no matter what, I will always be the young one. Well, I'll be the young one until they all die and I have to make friends with the spring chickens at the nursing home that is.
Nonetheless, after much difficulty planning the stupid thing (Yes, I planned it It's who I am. I can't fight my destiny. But no, there ain't no way in hell I'm planning the next one.) with Kelly, the event went surprisingly well. I think all had a good time...there were complaints here and there, but hey, when you raise your kids to think they deserve the world and then you fail to deliver, they get a little angry. So, eh, sorry you didn't get your free coke...we decided a free keg of delicious beer was a better use of the money. My hangover thanks you.
So, it was fun. It was a lot of fun. It was great to see everyone and catch up with old friends. I expected there to be a mish mash of people, but unfortunately for my gossip mill, most everyone that showed up was still thin, attractive, and succesful. My mom promised me that all the mean girls in school would grow up to be fat and nasty...but I think she lied. Or else they just aren't fat and nasty yet. I'll continue to hold out hope.
But I would say that the biggest let down of the evening was Facebook. Through Facebook, I have caught up with so many old friends which is awesome. HOWEVER, through Facebook, I caught up on all the litle details of their lives: Are they married? Do they have kids? Are they fat? Where do they live? Etc... So, when it came time to make small talk with this person I haven't seen in a decade, we had nothing to talk about. We already knew all the stuff. I knew you had a kid and it was a girl and she has a wierd name...I've been stalking you in on Facebook for a solid 2 years. Duh!
But the best part of the reunion was catching up with my old friends Sara and Alicia. Those girls got me through the hard stuff in high school and most of the hard stuff in college. I miss them dearly and hold our friendship so close to my heart...I wish I lived closer so it would all be easier. But, it's not and I have no intention of moving...so hear this Bez and Al, I WILL be keeping in touch better. So prepare!!! Love you guys!!
I think the highlight of my evening was going home to parent's house afterwards and smoking the cigars we found in the attic that my dad bought when I born...they say "It's a Girl". Dude. 28 year old cigars that have been living in the attic...you know you had fun when you think, "eh, it's not too bad".
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
All Good Things Must End.
I had an amazing week of training last week. I got a reasonable amount of sleep (for an insomniac), rocked every single workout, felt like a million bucks and just generally felt awesome.
But the wheels started to come off on Sunday. Tommy and I went for a long-ish run on Sunday afternoon. The plan was to do about 13-15 miles - I really needed to see how my knee was doing. So, we set out. The first mile was painful, as the first mile usually is, but as usual, you puch through mile 1 and mile 2 is generally pretty enjoyable. This was not the case on Sunday. Mile 1 was painful and mile 2 was worse. By mile 3 I was resigned to not enjoy the run, but knew I would put the miles in anyway...so I hunkered down and kept pounding the pavement.
My knee held out pretty well till mile 7 when the pain started setting in, and by mile 10, it was done. Which meant we had 3 miles to walk home...blah. Walking sucks. We had a good time, ran into some friends, but all in all, a crappy workout. A good run is one where you can space out and then all of the sudden you are at the finish line...this was not a good run.
I knew my week of workouts were in trouble. You don't have a week like I had last week without repercussions - I knew I was in for it.
My swim yesterday was blah. I did most of the workout, but I just wasn't feeling it - the guy in the lane next to me was the only thing that kept me going. I HAD to swim faster than him. Swimming is the only sport I am any good at, so I have to win pretty much all the time. Ha. I have been time trialing 400m each time I go to the pool to prepare for the sprint tri we are doing in May (it's my first sprint and I'm nervous - I am not a sprinter...at all). Lately my 400m times have been in the 6-6:30 range (a hard but not all out effort)...yesterday it was 7min and I was exhausted afterwards. Normally I am kind of out of breath but could have swum quite a bit more...yesterday I almost had to get out of the pool to catch my breath. Painful.
I do pilates everyday at lunch - it's a great way to break up the day and I don't get too sweaty so I can just come back to work. No one has commented on me smelling...yet. But yesterday, even pilates was hard. I only did about half my stuff. Everything about my body was just angry.
Then today...ugh, today. I didn't sleep well at all (typical, but last night was especially bad), but I got up and got on the bike. I had planned to take it super easy for an hour or two, to give my legs a rest, but they just weren't having it. Even my easy gear was tough...real tough. So I got off the bike and went back to bed for an hour. But then I couldn't sleep because I was so pissed off.
It's a vicious cycle.
I'm gonna do just pilates today, swim tomorrow and then, HOPEFULLY by Thursday my body will happy again and I can get back on track. I have to be in super shape to start the REAL training on June 1. 222 days till IMCOZ!!!
In other news, I'm getting my haircut today...let's all pray that my bangs have FINALLY grown out so I can give up the ridiculous teeny bopper hair do I have going on now. AND...AANNNNDDDD...it's Aggie Muster Day. If there is an A&M man in one hundred miles of you, you are expected to get together, eat a little, and live over the days you spent at the A&M College of Texas...and do that I shall.
But the wheels started to come off on Sunday. Tommy and I went for a long-ish run on Sunday afternoon. The plan was to do about 13-15 miles - I really needed to see how my knee was doing. So, we set out. The first mile was painful, as the first mile usually is, but as usual, you puch through mile 1 and mile 2 is generally pretty enjoyable. This was not the case on Sunday. Mile 1 was painful and mile 2 was worse. By mile 3 I was resigned to not enjoy the run, but knew I would put the miles in anyway...so I hunkered down and kept pounding the pavement.
My knee held out pretty well till mile 7 when the pain started setting in, and by mile 10, it was done. Which meant we had 3 miles to walk home...blah. Walking sucks. We had a good time, ran into some friends, but all in all, a crappy workout. A good run is one where you can space out and then all of the sudden you are at the finish line...this was not a good run.
I knew my week of workouts were in trouble. You don't have a week like I had last week without repercussions - I knew I was in for it.
My swim yesterday was blah. I did most of the workout, but I just wasn't feeling it - the guy in the lane next to me was the only thing that kept me going. I HAD to swim faster than him. Swimming is the only sport I am any good at, so I have to win pretty much all the time. Ha. I have been time trialing 400m each time I go to the pool to prepare for the sprint tri we are doing in May (it's my first sprint and I'm nervous - I am not a sprinter...at all). Lately my 400m times have been in the 6-6:30 range (a hard but not all out effort)...yesterday it was 7min and I was exhausted afterwards. Normally I am kind of out of breath but could have swum quite a bit more...yesterday I almost had to get out of the pool to catch my breath. Painful.
I do pilates everyday at lunch - it's a great way to break up the day and I don't get too sweaty so I can just come back to work. No one has commented on me smelling...yet. But yesterday, even pilates was hard. I only did about half my stuff. Everything about my body was just angry.
Then today...ugh, today. I didn't sleep well at all (typical, but last night was especially bad), but I got up and got on the bike. I had planned to take it super easy for an hour or two, to give my legs a rest, but they just weren't having it. Even my easy gear was tough...real tough. So I got off the bike and went back to bed for an hour. But then I couldn't sleep because I was so pissed off.
It's a vicious cycle.
I'm gonna do just pilates today, swim tomorrow and then, HOPEFULLY by Thursday my body will happy again and I can get back on track. I have to be in super shape to start the REAL training on June 1. 222 days till IMCOZ!!!
In other news, I'm getting my haircut today...let's all pray that my bangs have FINALLY grown out so I can give up the ridiculous teeny bopper hair do I have going on now. AND...AANNNNDDDD...it's Aggie Muster Day. If there is an A&M man in one hundred miles of you, you are expected to get together, eat a little, and live over the days you spent at the A&M College of Texas...and do that I shall.
Monday, November 03, 2008
Moving.
Tommy and I are attempting to buy a house. It would appear that if you are a dipshit, buying a house is easy (I'm basing this entirely on the number of foreclosures around the nation) and if you are trying to be smart, they pretty much try to stick things up your a$$ every chance they get. So, buying a house is hard and my ass hurts.
We are supposed to close tomorrow, but then again, we were supposed to close last week too, so, I'm not counting on much these days. We will see. My fingers are crossed and they have been for a looooong time.
I am really excited about moving into a house that isn't a piece of crap since that's all I've ever lived in my entire adult life. I have lived in 11 different places in the last 9 years...6 of those places have been in the last 4 years. That's just wrong.
1. August 1999-December 1999
Freshman Year
I shared a dorm room in Haas Hall with Emily. As it turns out, this was also the lesbian basketball player dorm. We were two of the few who didn't play sports and didn't prefer women. This dorm also had a very strange smell.
2. January 2000-May 2000
Freshman Year
I shared a VERY small dorm with this crazy girl named Kim. She would disappear for weeks and steal my clothes and my credit cards. She was awesome. I think she also used to hide under her bed so I wouldn't know she was there. Seriously. Creepy.
3. May 2000-August 2000
Freshman Summer
Moved back home with my parents for the summer because they wanted to torture me. Apparently I was bad enough that they requested that I never move back home. My plan was genius.
4. August 2000-August 2001
Sophomore Year
My first apartment was with Sara, Julienne and Kristin. Sara and Kristin shared a room and I had the cool converted living room so I had my own front door. I shared a bathroom with Julienne who also turned out to be a crazy girl. This place was a dump - http://www.poloclubapartments.net You know a place is good when they only pictures they show is the front office...and even that is scary. I once saw a man jerking off at the swimming pool. I'm telling you, this place was disgusting. BUT, it was my first apartment. I loved it.
5. August 2001-August 2002
Junior Year
Sara and I moved to a three bedroom apartment with her friend Jessica. This was the nicest place I have ever lived, other than the corporate apartment Dow gave me when I interned. This living situation just wasn't good for reasons that I can no longer remember, but it was drama at the time.
6. August 2002-August 2004
Senior and Second Senior Years
Due to the Drama at the previous apartment, I decided to go it alone and get my own place. This place was probably the worst of all the places and I am actually quite embarressed that I spent so long in a 400sq ft one room apartment. But since I was no longer splitting rents, I had to make ends meet. The Doux Chene...http://www.dcapts.com/ Once again, you KNOW it's good when they don't actually show any pictures. I painted a wall hot pink once and was too lazy to repaint...seriosly. Surprisingly though, I was very happy here and only have good memories...despite the blue carpet and hot pink wall. The place was so small I could open the fridge from my bed. There are some very specific reasons why I gained so much wieght in college...
During my time at the Doux Chene, I relocated to Houston for an internship, but since that apartment was furnished and I didn't have to lift a couch, I don't consider it a real move. I left all my stuff at the Blue Douche for the summer and came home 3 months later.
7. May 2004-November 2004
1st Few Months Out of College
I relocated to Houston after graudation and found a lovely little one bedroom that me and my giant mutt quickly outgrew. After a few months I realized that when the SPCA said he would be 35 pounds, they really meant 70 pounds, and I was going to need a bigger place. I don't know why I am constantly drawn to ugly and gross apartments, but once again, the website doesn't actually show any pictures of the buildings. http://www.tanglewoodcourt.com/
8. November 2004-August 2005
I was able to upgrade to a 2 bedroom apartment at the same complex where the mutt and I could flourish. This apartment was ghetto, but bigger, so therefore slightly less ghetto?
9. August 2005-August 2006
Why I always insisted on moving in the hottest month of the year, I have no idea. But I was able to find a cute little one bedroom house to rent right next to Memorial Park. It was perfect for Don and I. We were able to run to the park and play and he had a yard and it was magical. That is, it was magical until my landlord broke in one day and rearranged my furniture and opened all my windows. That was pretty awesome. So, I moved out.
10. August 2006-December 2006
Natalie and I moved into a giant house together. This seemed like a great idea, but what we didn't realize was that this landlord was even creepier than my previous landlord and only rented the place to us because we were young girls. He didn't even do a credit check. Bizarre. Around December, I pretty much moved out and moved in with Tommy.
11. December 2006-August 2008
I moved into my man friends VERY small garage apartment in the Heights...which, surprisingly is one of the best living situations I have ever had. Up until our landlord got this AWFUL monster Yorkie dog. I have never wanted to kick a puppy so much in my entire life. We lived almost 2 blissful years there before we got antsy. Sharing 700 sq ft with another person and a giant dog isn't easy. Our bathroom was so small that I could sit on the toilet, rest my head on the sink and wash my feet in the tub at the same time. We didn't have heat at all and only had central AC. It didn't have much, but we loved it. We had a storage shed for all our junk and we made weekly trips there to trade out things. The good news was that we could clean the place from top to bottom in under 2 hours. Despite having been robbed while we were sleeping, we loved the neighborhood, the people, the location, pretty much everything. This is where we want to live forever. Siiiiiiiigh.
12. August 2008-November 2008
The garage apartment just got too small and we decided we wanted to upgrade our renting capabilities so we could save for a couple more years before buying our dream house. Sooo, we found a great little bungalow in Montrose, which is a little seedier, but in an excellent location. Within one week of living there, our neighbors got robbed. Awesome. At least it wasn't us. This house has pretty much been a disaster from the beginning to the end. The AC was broken when we moved in and out of the first 53 days we lived there, we only had AC for 24 of those days. The house is cursed and I am pretty sure someone died a brutal death there and is trying to haunt us to get us to leave. No prob bob. We broke our lease and are moving out by the 12th.
Which brings us to home #13. Lucky #13. We are supposed to close on a house tomorrow morning and move tomorrow afternoon. This will be the 13th time I have packed all my belongings and moved them in 9 years. That averages out to me moving every 251 days or approx every 8 months. This is a cost of about $500 per move, excluding deposits...and a total of $6000.
The worst part though is when I have to reset a password (or something) and they want me to confirm where I lived in May of 2002 and I have no freaking clue.
Wish us luck tomorrow. It's gonna be a doozy.
We are supposed to close tomorrow, but then again, we were supposed to close last week too, so, I'm not counting on much these days. We will see. My fingers are crossed and they have been for a looooong time.
I am really excited about moving into a house that isn't a piece of crap since that's all I've ever lived in my entire adult life. I have lived in 11 different places in the last 9 years...6 of those places have been in the last 4 years. That's just wrong.
1. August 1999-December 1999
Freshman Year
I shared a dorm room in Haas Hall with Emily. As it turns out, this was also the lesbian basketball player dorm. We were two of the few who didn't play sports and didn't prefer women. This dorm also had a very strange smell.
2. January 2000-May 2000
Freshman Year
I shared a VERY small dorm with this crazy girl named Kim. She would disappear for weeks and steal my clothes and my credit cards. She was awesome. I think she also used to hide under her bed so I wouldn't know she was there. Seriously. Creepy.
3. May 2000-August 2000
Freshman Summer
Moved back home with my parents for the summer because they wanted to torture me. Apparently I was bad enough that they requested that I never move back home. My plan was genius.
4. August 2000-August 2001
Sophomore Year
My first apartment was with Sara, Julienne and Kristin. Sara and Kristin shared a room and I had the cool converted living room so I had my own front door. I shared a bathroom with Julienne who also turned out to be a crazy girl. This place was a dump - http://www.poloclubapartments.net You know a place is good when they only pictures they show is the front office...and even that is scary. I once saw a man jerking off at the swimming pool. I'm telling you, this place was disgusting. BUT, it was my first apartment. I loved it.
5. August 2001-August 2002
Junior Year
Sara and I moved to a three bedroom apartment with her friend Jessica. This was the nicest place I have ever lived, other than the corporate apartment Dow gave me when I interned. This living situation just wasn't good for reasons that I can no longer remember, but it was drama at the time.
6. August 2002-August 2004
Senior and Second Senior Years
Due to the Drama at the previous apartment, I decided to go it alone and get my own place. This place was probably the worst of all the places and I am actually quite embarressed that I spent so long in a 400sq ft one room apartment. But since I was no longer splitting rents, I had to make ends meet. The Doux Chene...http://www.dcapts.com/ Once again, you KNOW it's good when they don't actually show any pictures. I painted a wall hot pink once and was too lazy to repaint...seriosly. Surprisingly though, I was very happy here and only have good memories...despite the blue carpet and hot pink wall. The place was so small I could open the fridge from my bed. There are some very specific reasons why I gained so much wieght in college...
During my time at the Doux Chene, I relocated to Houston for an internship, but since that apartment was furnished and I didn't have to lift a couch, I don't consider it a real move. I left all my stuff at the Blue Douche for the summer and came home 3 months later.
7. May 2004-November 2004
1st Few Months Out of College
I relocated to Houston after graudation and found a lovely little one bedroom that me and my giant mutt quickly outgrew. After a few months I realized that when the SPCA said he would be 35 pounds, they really meant 70 pounds, and I was going to need a bigger place. I don't know why I am constantly drawn to ugly and gross apartments, but once again, the website doesn't actually show any pictures of the buildings. http://www.tanglewoodcourt.com/
8. November 2004-August 2005
I was able to upgrade to a 2 bedroom apartment at the same complex where the mutt and I could flourish. This apartment was ghetto, but bigger, so therefore slightly less ghetto?
9. August 2005-August 2006
Why I always insisted on moving in the hottest month of the year, I have no idea. But I was able to find a cute little one bedroom house to rent right next to Memorial Park. It was perfect for Don and I. We were able to run to the park and play and he had a yard and it was magical. That is, it was magical until my landlord broke in one day and rearranged my furniture and opened all my windows. That was pretty awesome. So, I moved out.
10. August 2006-December 2006
Natalie and I moved into a giant house together. This seemed like a great idea, but what we didn't realize was that this landlord was even creepier than my previous landlord and only rented the place to us because we were young girls. He didn't even do a credit check. Bizarre. Around December, I pretty much moved out and moved in with Tommy.
11. December 2006-August 2008
I moved into my man friends VERY small garage apartment in the Heights...which, surprisingly is one of the best living situations I have ever had. Up until our landlord got this AWFUL monster Yorkie dog. I have never wanted to kick a puppy so much in my entire life. We lived almost 2 blissful years there before we got antsy. Sharing 700 sq ft with another person and a giant dog isn't easy. Our bathroom was so small that I could sit on the toilet, rest my head on the sink and wash my feet in the tub at the same time. We didn't have heat at all and only had central AC. It didn't have much, but we loved it. We had a storage shed for all our junk and we made weekly trips there to trade out things. The good news was that we could clean the place from top to bottom in under 2 hours. Despite having been robbed while we were sleeping, we loved the neighborhood, the people, the location, pretty much everything. This is where we want to live forever. Siiiiiiiigh.
12. August 2008-November 2008
The garage apartment just got too small and we decided we wanted to upgrade our renting capabilities so we could save for a couple more years before buying our dream house. Sooo, we found a great little bungalow in Montrose, which is a little seedier, but in an excellent location. Within one week of living there, our neighbors got robbed. Awesome. At least it wasn't us. This house has pretty much been a disaster from the beginning to the end. The AC was broken when we moved in and out of the first 53 days we lived there, we only had AC for 24 of those days. The house is cursed and I am pretty sure someone died a brutal death there and is trying to haunt us to get us to leave. No prob bob. We broke our lease and are moving out by the 12th.
Which brings us to home #13. Lucky #13. We are supposed to close on a house tomorrow morning and move tomorrow afternoon. This will be the 13th time I have packed all my belongings and moved them in 9 years. That averages out to me moving every 251 days or approx every 8 months. This is a cost of about $500 per move, excluding deposits...and a total of $6000.
The worst part though is when I have to reset a password (or something) and they want me to confirm where I lived in May of 2002 and I have no freaking clue.
Wish us luck tomorrow. It's gonna be a doozy.
Monday, May 19, 2008
10 Things I Hate About You
Whistling/Singing/Humming to oneself. I just don't understand the reasoning behind this. Never once have I sung to myself in the presence of others. Don't get me wrong, I sing by myself all the time...that's the key though, I'm BY MYSELF. I don't understand people who hum while they pee, or sing in the stairwell, or whistle while they grocery shop. It's annoying. If I wanted music, I'd wear headphones. I may have to start wearing headphones just drown you out.
Conference calls on speakerphone in a cubicle farm.
Body Odor. But more specifically, men who sit next to me on planes with body odor.
Men with long gnarly fingernails (who don't do drugs and therefore have no need for gnarly long fingernails.)
Men with long gnarly fingernails...including the ones who do drugs.
Farting in a cubicle farm...we are not talking SBD's (Silent But Deadlys), we are talking full on tooting at regular intervals. Why must I be forced to contain my laughter? And why doens't anyone else think this is funny?
When the queso at a mexican food place is gross.
Valet parking at ridiculous places and at ridiculous times. More specifically, I hate paying to park and this is considered an acceptable reason for me to decline an invitation somewhere.
People with names like Tremendous Johnson. Yes, I have met a woman named Tremendous - she works at Academy on Westheimer at Voss. She was dumb as a stick. I realize these two things would appear to be unrelated, but I know that if my name was Tremendous, I probably wouldn't feel like I needed to use my brain either.
Customer Service Representatives. I dislike them all out of principle, but I really hate the ones who can't speak my language and/or who have absolutely no desire to actually fix the problem. I REALLY hate Comcast.
People who consistently can't turn off their cell phone ringers. And especially people who consistently can't turn off their cell phone ringers who have annoying rings. No, it not cool when your phone barks instead of rings. No, I do not like the theme song from Growing Pains (that's a lie, I DO like the theme song, just not every 20 minutes). You've been reminded 37 times to turn off your ringer...why are you an idiot?
People who repeat the same joke over and over again until you laugh. And before any of you judge me, I am well aware that I do this...but I hate it about myself. Ugh!The first step is recognizing that you have a problem. The second step is remembering that you don't talk about Fight Club.
Crumbly cheeses. Rain. Brussel sprouts. Small dogs. Small cars. Big bridges. Treadmill. Spiders, snakes and most other reptilia and amphibia and arachnids and such. Tequila. Retractable leashes. Cats.
These are just to name a few. I'm such an upbeat person.
Conference calls on speakerphone in a cubicle farm.
Body Odor. But more specifically, men who sit next to me on planes with body odor.
Men with long gnarly fingernails (who don't do drugs and therefore have no need for gnarly long fingernails.)
Men with long gnarly fingernails...including the ones who do drugs.
Farting in a cubicle farm...we are not talking SBD's (Silent But Deadlys), we are talking full on tooting at regular intervals. Why must I be forced to contain my laughter? And why doens't anyone else think this is funny?
When the queso at a mexican food place is gross.
Valet parking at ridiculous places and at ridiculous times. More specifically, I hate paying to park and this is considered an acceptable reason for me to decline an invitation somewhere.
People with names like Tremendous Johnson. Yes, I have met a woman named Tremendous - she works at Academy on Westheimer at Voss. She was dumb as a stick. I realize these two things would appear to be unrelated, but I know that if my name was Tremendous, I probably wouldn't feel like I needed to use my brain either.
Customer Service Representatives. I dislike them all out of principle, but I really hate the ones who can't speak my language and/or who have absolutely no desire to actually fix the problem. I REALLY hate Comcast.
People who consistently can't turn off their cell phone ringers. And especially people who consistently can't turn off their cell phone ringers who have annoying rings. No, it not cool when your phone barks instead of rings. No, I do not like the theme song from Growing Pains (that's a lie, I DO like the theme song, just not every 20 minutes). You've been reminded 37 times to turn off your ringer...why are you an idiot?
People who repeat the same joke over and over again until you laugh. And before any of you judge me, I am well aware that I do this...but I hate it about myself. Ugh!The first step is recognizing that you have a problem. The second step is remembering that you don't talk about Fight Club.
Crumbly cheeses. Rain. Brussel sprouts. Small dogs. Small cars. Big bridges. Treadmill. Spiders, snakes and most other reptilia and amphibia and arachnids and such. Tequila. Retractable leashes. Cats.
These are just to name a few. I'm such an upbeat person.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
TIGAH BAIT!
I attended my first game at Tiger Stadium in Baton Rouge, Louisiana last weekend. My lovely fiance, TB, has done nothing but bash A&M tailgates and bragged about the fabulousness of tailgating at LSU over the course of our relationship. We put he boasting to the test.
We have attended several games at A&M this season - my friends have the bus you know (www.15formeat.com) - and really, it doesn't get much better than a bus. We party with our friends, do a minimum of 15 keg stands and sleep in the car. It is a magical day. I decided to cave to pre-marital pressures and attend a game at LSU and wear gold no less (I tried to find a gray or white shirt, but they were sooo expensive and I didn't want to contribute to their delinquency any more than necessary - this shirt was $14, still a rip off). We drove down on Thursday night and stayed with his sister in suburbia New Orleans. Saturday, we drove back to Baton Rouge to meet our friends Gary and D for some football FUN!
Problem #1: The game was at 2:30. Apparently games are only good at LSU at night. Why do the fans have to be so prejudice about daylight? Tommy was very upset about the daytime-ness of the game. I was prepared for the worst.
Problem #2: We didn't have tickets. So we had to buy 4 - which wasn't a huge deal surprisingly. We got 4 tickets, together at face value. YEAH. Unfortunately, there were on row FF...which also happens to be the top top row of the stadium. The good news was that it was a great photo op and we had a wall top lean against instead of suporting our body wieght the whole time.
Problem #3: While the weather was nice and hot for the pre-game, right about the time we decided it would be a good idea to enter the stadium it started pouring. Now we are packed like sardines on an escalatror to get us up to row FF. It was far. And smelly. Sweaty wet people. Amost worse than smelly wet dogs. Almost. (but yes, they have escalators...AWESOME!)
Problem #4: Once I got wet, I got very cold. I spent quarter 3 hiding by the concession stands trying to dry off/warm up. But apparently it was too ot for Mike the Tiger to make an appearance. I hope Mike realizes that he lives in Louisiana and at some point he is gonna have to man up, stop being a big pussy (ha!) and learn how to survive in the heat.
Problem #5: The guide the traffic leaving the game down to one lane, with no where to go but straight. We stayed for the entire game, walked for 30 minutes to our car, hung out for an hour and we still waited in traffic for 1.25 hours. Smart people. Now I know why people leave early. It's the only way to preserve the sanity of the driver. (But seriously, thank goodness Gary was driving...we would not have made it out alive if TB had been behind the wheel - thanks Gary!)
But other than that, it was a good weekend. Haha. Other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play? Ha. But really, it was great to see Rebecca and her family and our friends! Nonetheless, LSU did not pass the rigorous tests of tailgating...I'll give them one more chance to prove me wrong, but it will have to wait until 2008!
I can't lie though, the highlight for me was the corn maze we did on the way home. Awesome. I heart corn...and I really heart it when it forms a maze I can walk through!!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
The Commute.
My commute sucks. A lot. I drive FROM downtown Houston to the 'burbs on I-10...I go against the traffic, but it still sucks. In fact, my traffic is often worse than the traffic going into town, but they NEVER mention the fact that it takes me 45 minutes to drive 12 miles everyday. Nonetheless, the other day I had a spectacular commute. It only took me 25 minutes and the music that was provided by my XM station (90's on 9) was AMAZING.
Song #1: I hop in the car after a great workout to hear the opening bars of "Pony" by Ginuwine. For those who don't know, this is a karaoke staple of mine and also one of my all time favorite songs. And I got to hear the whole thing. Don't you hate it when you only get to hear half of your favorite song? I do.
Song #2: New Kids on the Block (NKOTB) sing "Hangin' Tough" for me next. I grew up WORSHIPPING NKOTB. Worshipping. OMG, I hearted Donny. Hearted him.
Song #3: "Wonderwall" by Oasis. I know some of you are Oasis haters, but really, we probably shouldn't be friends anyway. Oasis rocks. The only way this could have been better would have been if the song had been "Champagne Supernova".
Song #4: We are starting to wind down now, I am exiting I-10 onto the Beltway when I hear "I Will Remember You" by Mrs Sarah MicLocklin (no idea how to spell it, so I'll just butcher it instead of trying). Just the right song to end my perfect commute to work on the right note.
This was the same day I dropped my keys down the elevator shaft. Awesome. I should have known something was up.
I didn't think I would need XM radio. I really didn't think I would get addicted. But I sooooo did. I need XM. Mostly I just need the 90's station...I would like to relive my formative years over and over and over. Maybe this time John Coil-oil will ask me to go steady with him. Ooooh, or maybe Sean Moore. Yeah. Him.
My commute sucks. A lot. I drive FROM downtown Houston to the 'burbs on I-10...I go against the traffic, but it still sucks. In fact, my traffic is often worse than the traffic going into town, but they NEVER mention the fact that it takes me 45 minutes to drive 12 miles everyday. Nonetheless, the other day I had a spectacular commute. It only took me 25 minutes and the music that was provided by my XM station (90's on 9) was AMAZING.
Song #1: I hop in the car after a great workout to hear the opening bars of "Pony" by Ginuwine. For those who don't know, this is a karaoke staple of mine and also one of my all time favorite songs. And I got to hear the whole thing. Don't you hate it when you only get to hear half of your favorite song? I do.
Song #2: New Kids on the Block (NKOTB) sing "Hangin' Tough" for me next. I grew up WORSHIPPING NKOTB. Worshipping. OMG, I hearted Donny. Hearted him.
Song #3: "Wonderwall" by Oasis. I know some of you are Oasis haters, but really, we probably shouldn't be friends anyway. Oasis rocks. The only way this could have been better would have been if the song had been "Champagne Supernova".
Song #4: We are starting to wind down now, I am exiting I-10 onto the Beltway when I hear "I Will Remember You" by Mrs Sarah MicLocklin (no idea how to spell it, so I'll just butcher it instead of trying). Just the right song to end my perfect commute to work on the right note.
This was the same day I dropped my keys down the elevator shaft. Awesome. I should have known something was up.
I didn't think I would need XM radio. I really didn't think I would get addicted. But I sooooo did. I need XM. Mostly I just need the 90's station...I would like to relive my formative years over and over and over. Maybe this time John Coil-oil will ask me to go steady with him. Ooooh, or maybe Sean Moore. Yeah. Him.
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Funnies.
This was sent by Gilmore and enjoyed by many:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=rules/070905&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab2pos1
...the best part of this site is Rule #22. See, Tommy, it is UNACCEPTABLE to not know the words to your fight song. No excuses. Slacker. The good news is that you have at least 37 schools can you root for...seeing as how you went to all of them. The bad news is that you have a lot of fight songs to learn.
This was sent by Christine and enjoyed by me, pretty much everyday for the last 3 months:
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
...the best part of this site is pretty much all of it. I hate passive aggressiveness and pretty much passiveness all together. If you're being passive, you obviously don't care enough and therefore I win until you decide to grow some balls and have an actual opinion.
This was sent by Gilmore and enjoyed by many:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=rules/070905&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab2pos1
...the best part of this site is Rule #22. See, Tommy, it is UNACCEPTABLE to not know the words to your fight song. No excuses. Slacker. The good news is that you have at least 37 schools can you root for...seeing as how you went to all of them. The bad news is that you have a lot of fight songs to learn.
This was sent by Christine and enjoyed by me, pretty much everyday for the last 3 months:
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
...the best part of this site is pretty much all of it. I hate passive aggressiveness and pretty much passiveness all together. If you're being passive, you obviously don't care enough and therefore I win until you decide to grow some balls and have an actual opinion.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Josh is funny.
I hope he doesn't mind that I am stealing his 'notes' from Facebook, but who cares.
Displaying all 5 notes by Joshua.
On the subject of subjugation
by Joshua (notes) 9:05am Thursday, Oct 26
According to facebook, I can't be in a relationship with myself. This is horse shit. I mean, I'm with myself every day, and I know myself better than anyone. I can't break up with myself just because facebook doesn't approve of our relationship. What am I going to tell myself when I ask myself why I'm not in mentioned in the relationship status? Am I hiding something from myself?
The New Style
by Joshua (notes) 10:53am Saturday, Oct 21
This new trend of women wearing tights is ridicolous. They're not hip. They don't look sexy. And oversized sunglasses aren't appealing either. So cut it out already.
On the subject of Communists
by Joshua (notes) 1:39pm Thursday, Oct 19
We should feed North Korea to China.
On the subject of objective thinking
by Joshua (notes) 5:20pm Tuesday, Oct 10
Well, I failed my math test. I've been failing math tests since math tests and I ever met. I mean, simple multiplication, addition, subtraction, and division are simple. But algebra, MOSTLY algebra, doesn't make any sense to me. The introduction of imaginary numbers is absolutely puzzling. It's like introducing an imaginary wallet into an equation when I have to pay. It's neither here nor there. It's just a waste of time. It's entirely too two dimensional. Not to play on words, but criminy. So, I guess I'll study hard for the next three tests, and with any luck, I'll finish the last math class of my life with a 70. If not, don't be surprised to hear about some arson on the local news. I won't burn anything useful. Just maybe a couple city halls or a mall.
I hope he doesn't mind that I am stealing his 'notes' from Facebook, but who cares.
Displaying all 5 notes by Joshua.
On the subject of subjugation
by Joshua (notes) 9:05am Thursday, Oct 26
According to facebook, I can't be in a relationship with myself. This is horse shit. I mean, I'm with myself every day, and I know myself better than anyone. I can't break up with myself just because facebook doesn't approve of our relationship. What am I going to tell myself when I ask myself why I'm not in mentioned in the relationship status? Am I hiding something from myself?
The New Style
by Joshua (notes) 10:53am Saturday, Oct 21
This new trend of women wearing tights is ridicolous. They're not hip. They don't look sexy. And oversized sunglasses aren't appealing either. So cut it out already.
On the subject of Communists
by Joshua (notes) 1:39pm Thursday, Oct 19
We should feed North Korea to China.
On the subject of objective thinking
by Joshua (notes) 5:20pm Tuesday, Oct 10
Well, I failed my math test. I've been failing math tests since math tests and I ever met. I mean, simple multiplication, addition, subtraction, and division are simple. But algebra, MOSTLY algebra, doesn't make any sense to me. The introduction of imaginary numbers is absolutely puzzling. It's like introducing an imaginary wallet into an equation when I have to pay. It's neither here nor there. It's just a waste of time. It's entirely too two dimensional. Not to play on words, but criminy. So, I guess I'll study hard for the next three tests, and with any luck, I'll finish the last math class of my life with a 70. If not, don't be surprised to hear about some arson on the local news. I won't burn anything useful. Just maybe a couple city halls or a mall.
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